I wasn’t going to publish this post. It seemed too dark, sad, a bit creepy really… but a friend commented on my Facebook page: “Your mission statement is strong. Caring community is crucial and I love stories.” So I changed my mind…
There’s this rather catchy tune being played on the radio… “Take Me To Church” by Hozier. Before you take off and listen to it… please know this is not a happy clappy worship sing. I’m not even sure I would recommend listening to it with children in the room, but the first few lines of that song speak to me.
My lover’s got humor
She’s the giggle at a funeral
Knows everyone’s disapproval…
It makes me think of the awkwardness of grief. When your heart is torn apart and the gaping wounds are gushing copious amounts of life fluid and you are sure you will not survive this torture.
In the midst of the haze that surrounds you like an uncomfortable damp blanket, that doesn’t allow you to feel warmth, there are brief pockets where for a split second you forget.
You forget that one you love is gone from you, and maybe in that little pocket you will find a giggle. And you will probably feel guilty when that giggle escapes. Maybe even beat yourself up a little bit. Who laughs when someone has left? Who laughs when their soul has been torn?
People do. Human beings whose emotions are sometimes beyond their control. In spite of disapproval.